April as a bottle blonde and Lauren as Pat Benatar...more photos from the wig shop!
Good news first: The Breast Cancer Gene test came back negative. Yay. No double mastectomy or ovary removal in my future.
Not so good news: Or, shall I say inconclusive news. The MRI results for the liver spot are in. My doctor called me and the MRI showed a 6mm spot (tiny) on my liver, confirming the CT and PET scan from last week. Unfortunately, nobody knows what it is. Her gut is that it isn't anything serious but, she cannot confirm that. She's been doing this a long time and I trust her judgment.
Worse case scenario: if it is the cancer spreading to my liver, that means it is "incurable." They can still do treatment but, they can never pronounce me "cured." Not quite sure what that means: a lifetime of gray area?
So, the head of radiology wants to do ANOTHER CT scan of my liver. Yes, the horrible one that requires 6 hours of fasting, a radioactive isotope and no movement for 45 minutes. He will do it personally and analyze it as we go. If he sees something on it real-time, he will do a biopsy. The problem is that the spot is so small, they aren't sure if they can biopsy it. The thought of a needle going into my liver for a biopsy chills me to the bone. Disgusting.
There is a 1 in 3 shot that they will be able to see something and biopsy it and my doctor thinks that I should try. At least we'd have an answer if it is a birthmark or a benign cyst. If they can't tell, we are just going to have to treat it as regular breast cancer as planned and keep checking back to see if it grows. If it grows, then it is cancer.
I'm choosing to believe it is a birthmark. I'll have the additional test next week but, we will stay with the plan of starting chemotherapy on Thursday the 11th. Part of me wants to skip the test. It sucked last time. Digging deep on the vocabulary today.
I'm absolutely, completely exhausted. Toast. I've lost track of the tests, appointments, injections and phone calls. I'm so thrilled that I've got no appointments tomorrow and then the weekend in Palm Springs with Lissa, Kir and Meredith. Three blissful days without having to be anywhere at a certain time. I have the best friends ever. And, not just because they take me places.
Must sleep. Must recharge.
Do you have an "appnt" keeper for you. Like a literal person (someone really close/dependable)? Maybe you can delegate that to someone, so all you have to worry about is literally caring for yourself.
ReplyDeleteI hope you are going to bed. And, when you rest in Palm Springs, make sure not to forget the sunscreen, or you will be fried and that spray tan will go to waste.
Thanks for the update, Cindy (Crawford). Told you I was gonna start calling you that. And is a BEAUTY mark, not a birthmark. ;)
ReplyDeletexoxo