Feeling wobbly, just like I did in this photo balancing on one foot in the freezing iceplant. Thank goodness for Laura saving me from a tumble off of the cliff.
Sadly, my rollercoaster seems to be hovering at the bottom of the dip. Head on up, up, up! My energy levels are so low that I felt totally woozy and almost fell over at the cat house at Petco this morning. It started yesterday afternoon and just won't abate. I believe this is the time after chemotherapy when the white and red blood cell counts hit their lowest.
How does this make me feel? Two options for you: mild flu when you ache all over, your stomach is jumpy and you just want grilled cheese and chicken and rice soup. Or, you went out last night and thought it was a good idea to have the third apple martini, or margarita or....insert dangerous cocktail here. Either option yields the same results: must stay horizontal. Very disappointing! The unpredictability of how I am going to feel each day really bothers me.
Okay, the bright side: this will be the last dip I'll have knowing that I'll get knocked down again after my final chemo on June 24th. Thereafter, I will climb up and know that I don't have to go through this ever again. Ever again. If by some terrible chance I did have a recurrence, I would not do chemo again. This I know for sure.
So, I will lay around like a lump all weekend. Todd and I are going to Napa on Thursday and I need to feel fabulous! A romantic few days, staying at a winery in a beautiful loft converted from a barn, surrounded by vines. Motivation to rest now.
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